Saturday, January 7, 2012

Revisiting My Acedia, God's Will, Good Works And God's Truth

On December 30, 2010, I asked God for the vision and the voice, the courage and the confidence, the strength and the stamina to do His will. Nothing happened. A few days ago, I read the last of Saint Bonaventure of Bagnoregio's evening sermons preached at Paris on October 4, 1267. It was difficult to read and over my head because it was full of quotes from the Bible and I am not a biblical scholar. However, one sentence that I did get stood out from the 6 1/2-page sermon:

"If we are ready to do what pleases God He will make His will known to us." [1]

I suppose I am not ready for my mind goes blank with fear and I freeze in place whenever I think of any good that I might be capable of doing. After all the reading, thinking and analysis that I have done in the hope that I would be able to make a difference have proven to be futile. [2]

I am back to an ordinary life, in my mind only, for I have not stepped out of it in reality.

[1] Armstrong, Regis J. O.F.M. Cap. et.al. Francis of Assisi: Early Documents, Volume II, The Founder. Page 760. New York: New York City Press, 2000. [1.1]

[1.1] The sentence quoted above began a paragraph. This sentence ended it: "God, who is Creator, Sanctifier, and Glorifier, wills only what is good." Ibid at [1]

[2] See blog entries Parts 1 through 7 under "Making A Difference" in October and November of 2011.

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